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Dublin: 9 °C Friday 19 April, 2024
HEAVY FINERY

6 of the most important tips from Vogue's 'Heavy Dress Workout'

They’re a lot of work, those gowns.

SICK OF FEELING exhausted after an evening of wearing huge, spectacular ball gowns to the fanciest of galas? We can totally sympathise. These things can weigh as much as 18 pounds.

However, Vogue have done one better, offering fitness tips to those of you too WEAK to wear a dress.

We’re inspired.

1. First off, please acknowledge that this is serious business

You need serious stamina to pull off an oversize frock.

And that’s just after you’ve done the shopping.

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2. Wearing these dresses are hideously exhausting, but sure they look pretty

I’d compare it to wearing a weighted vest around all night. Core strength is crucial.

Ah, a weighed vest. The essential ingredient to any good night out.

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3. So tips. Clench, clench a lot

In preparation, you should engage your abs all day, whether you’re walking, driving, watching TV, or sitting at your desk.

Basically prolong the discomfort for days before the climax.

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4. But make it FUN

Fun core exercises like crunches, Russian twists with a ball, kick-outs, knee-tucks, vertical knee raises, back extensions, and pronated and supinated V-ups. Tighten your abdominal muscles, belly button to spine, and keep your chest up and shoulders back. Find that beautiful curve in your lower back.

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5. Make sure you don’t ruin your dress by slouching

Since gliding across the threshold of the museum’s grand doors or ascending a staircase with the requisite gravitas requires presence, posture is key.
Tight chest muscles will cause you to slouch, so in addition to core-strengthening exercises and high-intensity interval training, set aside 30 to 60 minutes a week for targeted stretching.

Do we HAVE TO?

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6. Leg strength is also important for like, standing

In order to endure hours in five-inch heels and a heavy, structured dress, you need supreme balance, calf strength, and cardio fitness.

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Think we’ll just stay at home and watch Netflix in our pjs, to be honest.

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