1. Cheer up your favourite Chelsea supporter
It’s time for your favourite Chelsea fan to snap out of their trance of misery. And what better way than to re-live their most recent past glories.
2. Klopp-mania is here to stay, don’t miss out
Don’t be left be behind this festive period. Normal in name only, the messiah of football hipsters is THE face to be seen wearing on your torso this winter. You were warned.
3. You’ll never eat eggs from a regular cup again
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Short on stocking fillers this year? Why not spice up the most important meal of the day with the type of crockery other football clubs could only dream of?
*Egg, soldiers not included.
4. Something to distract Arsenal fans from European misery
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What better way to get over Arsenal’s European woes and 11 years without a Premier League title than to relive the glory days of yesteryear with this retro football. It may become invisible on standard winter pitches though.
5. Show your colours while earning brownie points
As Remi Garde attempts to dig Aston Villa out of a hole why not mimic the club’s new chief in your own back garden?
6. Wondered what has stopped your loved one’s team getting promoted all these years? Fear no more
Time for a fresh approach – your loved one’s side will playing fluent, passing football a la Roberto Martinez’s Toffees in no time.
7. Missing links no more
It’s normal to lose cufflinks down the back of the wardrobe but Bohs fans will make sure they have these tucked away carefully for every special occasion.
8. Beach trips will never be the same again
Well now you know. Trips to the seaside are few and far between in Ireland – why not go all out with a garden gnome in casual summer dress. Your loved one will be the envy of all their sunburnt friends with this Bayern Munich-loving Santa Claus.
9. Show some solidarity with Steve
What more could a Newcastle fan want for Christmas other than Steve McClaren’s favourite accessory? Eight years on since the infamous ‘Wally with the Brolly’ incident, we haven’t forgotten, and neither should you.