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Micheál-isms: the best Ó Muircheartaigh quotes

Voice of gaelic games to bow out tomorrow

Image: INPHO/Cathal Noonan

MICHEÁL Ó MUIRCHEARTAIGH’S  microphone will finally fall silent after the broadcast of the second International Rules test from Croke Park tomorrrow.

The second Test against Mick Malthouse’s side will be the beloved Kerryman’s final live match on RTÉ Radio.

Ó Muircheartaigh announced in September that he is to retire, and will bow out as Ireland look to overcome a seven-point deficit from the first test in Limerick.

So as one of the greats climbs from the gantry for the last time, here are our favourite Micheál-isms: the best quotes uttered by a broadcasting legend.

Seán Óg Ó hAilpín: his father’s from Fermanagh, his mother’s from Fiji. Neither a hurling stronghold.

…and Brian Dooher is down injured. And while he is, I’ll tell ye a little story: I was in Times Square in New York last week, and I was missing the Championship back home. So I approached a newsstand and I said, “I suppose ye wouldn’t have The Kerryman, would ye?” To which, the Egyptian behind the counter turned to me and he said, “Do you want the North Kerry edition, or the South Kerry edition?” He had both – so I bought both. And Dooher is back on his feet…

Anthony Lynch, the Cork corner-back, will be the last person to let you down – his people are undertakers.

Colin Corkery on the 45 lets go with the right boot. Its over the bar. This man shouldn’t be playing football. He’s made an almost Lazarus-like recovery from a heart condition. Lazarus was a great man but he couldn’t kick points like Colin Corkery.

The stopwatch has stopped. It’s up to God and the referee now. The referee is Pat Horan. God is God.

Dublin have scored two points, one from the hand and one from the land.

Teddy McCarthy to Mick McCarthy, no relation, Mick McCarthy back to Teddy McCarthy, still no relation.

I saw a few Sligo people at Mass in Gardiner Street this morning and the omens seem to be good for them. The priest was wearing the same colours as the Sligo jersey! 40 yards out on the Hogan Stand side of the field, Ciarán Whelan goes on a rampage… it’s a goal! So much for religion.

He grabs the sliothar, he’s on the 50! He’s on the 40! He’s on the 30… he’s on the ground!

Pat Fox out to the forty and grabs the sliothar. I bought a dog from his father last week. Fox turns and sprints for goal… the dog ran a great race last Tuesday in Limerick… Fox, to the 21, fires a shot – it goes to the left and wide… and the dog lost as well.

He kicks the ball lán san aer. Could’ve been a goal, could’ve been a point… it went wide.

I see John O’Donnell dispensing water on the sideline. Tipperary, sponsored by a water company. Cork, sponsored by a tae company. I wonder will they meet later for afternoon tae.

In the first half they played with the wind. In the second half they played with the ball.

1-5 to 0-8… well, from Lapland to the Antarctic, that’s level scores in any man’s language.

Pat Fox has it on his hurl and is motoring well now, but here comes Joe Rabbitte hot on his tail… I’ve seen it all now, a Rabbitte chasing a Fox around Croke Park!

Stephen Byrne with the puck out for Offaly. Stephen, one of 12. All but one are here to-day, the one that’s missing is Mary, she’s at home minding the house. And the ball is dropping i lár na bpáirce…

Teddy looks at the ball, the ball looks at Teddy…

Mike Houlihan for Limerick. Houlihan, the cattle jobber. He had his jaw broken by a kick from a bullock two months ago. He’s back now. ‘Twas some bullock that broke Mike Houlihan’s jaw!

Danny ‘The Yank’ Culloty: he came down from the mountains and hasn’t he done well.

Gavin Cooney
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