Will it happen?

Spurs’ Soldado: North London and Valencia’s white shirted football teams dominate the landscape today after Tottenham Hotspur made a bid for Roberto Soldado. The men from La Mastalla are holding out for exactly £26 million.

Spending money: It seems the Mediterranean side have already decided what to do with the first part of their wad of cash coming in, Lille’s Solomon Kalou. The French club had already accepted a bid from West Ham, but I think we’re all agreed a seaside villa would be better.

Will it happen?

Modric to Manchester, again: With Cesc Fabregas looking more unlikely by the day, Manchester United have gone back through their transfer target archive and came up with – no, not Esteban Cambiasso – Luka Modric. Could be a good fit, maybe. Especially if Los Blancos are of a mood to please the accountants after splashing stupid money on Gareth Bale.

Will it happen?

What? More news of Valencia?: That’s right. This time it comes thanks to the News of the World who reckon Javier Hernandez would fit snugly into Soldado’s boots. It’s an attractive proposition for the Little Pea, it’s just that we can only see one striker leaving Old Trafford before Jim White slams the transfer window shut.

Swedish goalie sent off after 44 seconds for the worst handball ever

Here’s the image of Leo Messi that the ‘Argentinian Hello’ magazine will lead with