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(Dana) White lies, the weight of gold and the rest of this week's best sportswriting

All that, plus an essential long-read on Tiger Woods.

1.It was the first time anyone had won three South African titles in a day but it was the manner of their achievement which left the deepest impression. Semenya barely broke sweat in each race until the home straight. As the TV commentator in the 800m, which she won by seven seconds, put it: “My word this is something special. She is jogging!”

Sean Ingle points out that Caster Semeya’s return to peak form could mean a summer of controversy ahead.

2. “’I’m not mad at Conor … Our relationship isn’t damaged at all … I’m not even mad a little bit … No, I’m not mad at all.’

Dana White Cathal Noonan / INPHO Cathal Noonan / INPHO / INPHO

“It looks like I added the last two parts for satirical comedy, but no, he actually said all those things over a matter of seconds. He’s definitely not mad, guys. Not even mad a little bit. If you’ve ever dated someone longer than two months or if you’ve ever argued on the internet, you know that “I’m not mad” is modern parlance for “I am definitely mad.” If you’ve been exposed to Dana White over the past 15 years, you know that Dana White is definitely mad.”

On Sherdog.com, Jordan Breen puts the face of the UFC under scrutiny after a fall-out with Conor McGregor.

3. “Gareth Bale weighs 74kg – a quantity of gold that you could buy for a little under £2.1m at today’s prices,” begins Steve Hyde. “If there’s a poorly written ‘his weight in gold’ release clause in his contract, potential transfer suitors should get on that right away.”

No, seriously. Who was the first player to actually be worth their weight in gold? Gregg Bakowski seeks out the historical data for The Guardian.

4. “On the far western end of an island in the Bahamas, Tiger Woods is where he feels most comfortable: hidden behind multiple layers of security and exclusivity, standing with two or three friends in the dark of a marina. It’s early December, 28 days before his 40th birthday. His annual tournament begins at a nearby course soon. Both his boats float a few dozen yards away, in two of the first three slips: the 155-foot yacht named Privacy, alongside the smaller, sleeker diving boat he named Solitude. On the main deck of the big boat, there’s a basket of sunscreen, a pile of rolled towels and a white orchid. The marina around them couldn’t be more private, without a coffee shop or store, not even showing up on the navigational charts in some maritime GPS systems. (Woods’ camp declined to comment for this story.)”

tiger change

ESPN and Wright Thompson deliver a ‘secret history’ of Tiger Woods that is well worth a chunk of your time today.

5. “The most provocative thing about Lin this season might have been his changing hairstyles. Lin has been trying to grow his hair out to some unspecified length, and the process led him to improvise various coiffures: Mohawks, side parts, ponytails. He laughed this week about the way fans on social media and interviewers had tried to use his hair as a window to his inner life, to find some symbolism in the hairdos, to attach some special meaning to styling gel.”

You remember Jeremy ‘Linsanity’ Lin, right? He hasn’t gone away, even if the hype has. Andrew Keh writes this piece for the New York Times.

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