Sang Tan/AP/Press Association Images Giroud, Giroud - he's bound to score one or two.

Diary of a Fantasy Gaffer: Must. Not. Use... Wildcard...

Resist the temptation, you can make up those eight points in 90 short minutes.

EIGHT POINTS. HOW hard will that be?

Two clean sheets, two goals from front men, a midfielder’s goal and assist?

Sure, we could make that up before 3pm Saturday. Easy!

You see, through circumstances beyond our control…

  • Juan Mata being shafted by Chelsea.
  • Chelsea swanning off to Prague for the weekend.
  • Vincent Kompany crying off.
  • Yannick Sagbo being a loose cannon.

… it was with a heavy heart that we had to make (*gulp) three transfers to TheScore Machine this week.

So, we begin GameWeek three eight shots off the lead. It’s gonna be totally worth it, though.

That golden get-out-of-jail-free wildcard tucked away in our wallet is for a scenario when a complete overhaul is needed. Once the transfer window slams shut next week and Jim White goes back to his indoor voice we can all settle down in the knowledge that plans will sometimes come to fruition.

With any luck, we won’t have to use it until late in the season, the January Wildcard helping us through the winter until all the mid-table mediocre sides mentally check out for summer. Wishful thinking; it’ll probably be gone by October.

So Sagbo is scrapped after an – ahem – action-packed 27 minutes which included an assist and a red card. Vincent Kompany isn’t sure how long he’ll be out for, so he’s cut. Meanwhile, we’ve gone for a like for like substitution with David Silva coming in for Mata.

Even after recruiting Manchester City’s little maestro and making him captain, we’ve got some fat stacks to throw around. So, as Arsenal are bound to score at least once against Spurs before six games against mid-table to struggling sides, we’re splashing £8.6 million to jump on the Olivier Giroud bandwagon.

That left us with a measly 4.2 million for a defender. Fear not. Norwich’s Steven Whittaker is the bargain you’re after.

Eight points in 90 minutes? It can be done.

Over to you, Señor Silva.


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Godfrey the Gaffer
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