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'I'm not Harry Potter' - 11 of the most memorable Jose Mourinho quotes

It was confirmed that the Special One would become Man United manager yesterday.

Mourinho has just been confirmed as Man United manager.
Mourinho has just been confirmed as Man United manager.

Updated at 11.07

AFTER JOSE MOURINHO was confirmed as Man United manager yesterday, we revisit some of the Special One’s most memorable quotes…

“Please don’t call me arrogant, but I’m European champion and I think I’m a special one.”

And thus a star was born. Mourinho introduced himself to the English press with arguably his most famous line, as he responded to doubts that he was not suitable to work in the Premier League.

“If they made a film of my life, I think they should get George Clooney to play me. He’s a fantastic actor and my wife thinks he would be ideal.”

Mourinho is A-list material in his own right, but left everyone in no doubt as to who his wife would like to see on the big screen in a Jose biopic.

“For me, pressure is bird flu. I’m feeling a lot of pressure with the problem in Scotland. It’s not fun and I’m more scared of it than football.”

Calmness in the face of adversity? Not if adversity is bird flu evidently, as Mourinho quelled talk that his Chelsea side would struggle to see out their title defence in 2006.

“What position is my wife in? Eighth at least.”

Behind every great man is a great woman, even a man who was surveyed as the ninth most influential man in the world.

“Look, I’m a coach, I’m not Harry Potter. He is magical, but in reality there is no magic. Magic is fiction and football is real.”

Mourinho warned Real Madrid fans not to expect him to wave a magic wand to bring trophies to the club.

(Then-FC Porto manager Jose Mourinho celebrates his team’s 1-1 draw and progression to the quarter finals after the UEFA Champions League match at Old Trafford - Martin Rickett/PA Archive/Press Association Images)

“You would be sad if your team gets as clearly dominated by opponents who have been built on 10 percent of the budget.”

Rubbing salt into Alex Ferguson’s wounds, after his Porto side knocked Manchester United out of the Champions League.


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“I think he is one of those people who is a voyeur. He likes to watch other people. There are some guys who, when they are at home, have a big telescope to see what happens in other families.”

One of Mourinho’s more ill-advised comments, when responding to Arsene Wenger’s criticism of his Chelsea side. A remark which he would later apologise for.

“Sometimes you see beautiful people with no brains. Sometimes you have ugly people who are intelligent, like scientists.”

A metaphor to describe the state of the Stamford Bridge pitch, ahead of a UEFA Champions League tie with Barcelona in 2006.

“I would love an Aston Martin but if you ask me one million pounds for an Aston Martin, I tell you, you are crazy because they cost 250,000 pounds.”

Mourinho describing how Chelsea would not be paying over-the-odds in the transfer market.

“I am Jose Mourinho and I don’t change. I arrive with all my qualities and my defects.”

Upon his arrival at Real, Mourinho said he will never change his approach. He has stayed true to his word.

Source: BeanymanSports/YouTube

“I have nothing to say!”

Mourinho wasn’t giving much away after watching his side lose 3-1 to Liverpool last August.

A version of this post was originally published on 20 May, 2013. 

What’s your favourite Mourinho quote? Let us know in the comments section below.

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