Move over Andy Cole, there's a new terrible rapping footballer in town

RyGuy should say goodbye.

Ryan Guy is a unique talent.
Ryan Guy is a unique talent.

SOME PEOPLE ARE born lucky and possess athletic ability and artistic talent.

Others, not so much.

Step forward Ryan Guy, the Guam international who plys his trade with the San Antonio Scorpions and his new rap video, Never Stop Running.

It opens with the refrain:

“I got my feet on the ground and got my head in the clouds
But I will never look down ’cause up above is where life can be found
Yes Jesus Christ & he alone will be who gets me on my knees at night
Praying hard, scoring goals for the afterlife.”

And only gets worse from there:

Gavin Cooney
Reports From Qatar

Get Gavin's exclusive writing and analysis from the 2022 Fifa World Cup

Become a Member

Source: San Antonio Scorpions/YouTube

But just in case you’d forgotten how awful Andy Cole’s “music” career was…

Source: Adam Doherty/YouTube

15 other great Irish goals we won’t forget along with John O’Shea’s strike last night

Mats Hummels: ‘Ireland didn’t come here to play football’

About the author:

Steve O'Rourke

Read next: