1. Better to buy in bulk
When it was said in the Portlaoise press box yesterday afternoon that Kildare looked like the England rugby team, it was meant as a compliment. Honestly.
Even Peter Kelly at corner-back could bluff it as a centre and that’s as much to do with his and his teammate’s size as it is the tight-fitting jerseys. Quite simply they are a huge group of players and if they collide with Cork at some stage this summer we’d suggest you stand under a door frame as per earthquake drills.
Better safe than sorry.
A look at the opposition though, and it was the opposite. That was part of the reason Offaly never stood a chance. Beside their opponents they looked malnourished and were out on their feet before the 25-minute mark from trying to make and break tackles. We all know the reason as they’ve gone through so many managers and have never had a proper weights programme set up and have never had a three-year plan implemented.
But until such time as they do all that, they won’t get anywhere. Gone are the days of screaming and roaring in the dressing room because passion will not get the better of quality and size. And more than ever, size matters hugely right now.
2. Kildare forwards and the age-old myth
I grew up watching Kildare football, and it’s true, at times in my childhood their shot selection was only matched by their accuracy and none of that was a positive.
They were criticised then for having no forwards but to do the same now is misguided and based on history. It’s also misguided to talk about their lack of goals hurting them. Yesterday they weren’t at their most accurate, didn’t convert three-and-a-half goal chances but such traits have become the exception rather than the rule for this group.
Sure they kicked some bad wides, and some worse balls into Alan Mulhall’s hands in the Offaly goal but they still kicked 19 points and just look at recent stats to see this attacking unit’s potential.
In their last 21 championship games before yesterday, a tally that goes back to 2009, they scored 23 goals which were spread relatively evenly across all games. Across 2009 and 2010 they averaged 1.2 goals and 15 points per game, or 18.6 per championship outing which made them the highest scoring team in the nation. Last year wasn’t so good, but they were still averaging 16.6 per game. Then there’s this league where their 9-105 made them the highest scoring team across all four divisions bar Wexford, excluding Kilkenny results naturally.
Kildare have their flaws this season as they’ve had in other seasons, but they also have the best attack the county has ever had helped by a fast-breaking defence, so if we must have a go at them let it be on present problems, not historical ones.
3. First cut is the deepest
Poor Carlow. They never stood a chance in the replay. No minnow ever really does and going back through the record books, it’s hard to find examples of true underdogs biting the second day as well as the first. Take a look at the back-door era and the following is the long list of sides who were expected to win the first day, needed a second chance and took it. After a replay Kerry beat Dublin in 2001, Dublin beat Donegal while Armagh beat Sligo in 2002; Meath beat Westmeath while Tyrone beat Down and Derry in 2003; Mayo beat Fermanagh, Roscommon beat Leitrim and Kerry beat Limerick in 2004; Tyrone beat Cavan and Dublin in 2005 while the same year Armagh beat Donegal and Cavan beat Antrim; in 2006 Tyrone beat Louth and Armagh beat Monaghan; in 2007 Down beat Cavan, Louth beat Wicklow and Dublin beat Meath; Armagh beat Fermanagh in 2008 while Kildare beat Antrim in 2010.
All replays. All predictable results.
Even extra-time doesn’t bode well for the lesser side. Just look at Leitrim-New York in 2003, Donegal-Leitrim in 2007, in 2010 Meath got the better of Laois and Dublin the better of Wexford, Offaly got the better of Clare and Cork got the better of Limerick while Mayo got the better of London in 2011.
All extra-time. All predictable results.
Which brings to the category of actual shocks after 70 minutes have been played. Cork beat Kerry in a replay in 2002 and 2006 but Cork can hardly be classified as minnows and they game when played in Munster takes on a life of its own. Sligo beat Galway in a replay in 2010 but had shown before they were every bit as good as the opposition. That leaves us with Westmeath beating Laois and Down beating Tyrone in replays in 2004 and 2008 respectively. Two shocks when the first chance wasn’t taken in 11 years of championship football.
4. A lack of football in the Derry air
John Brennan’s comments were those of a man on the way out of the dressing room door, never to return. He sounded fed up as he said of his team after Saturday night’s defeat that it’s not his job to stand beside them during a game, roaring basics into their eard, that is was disastrous football and that it’s a hopeless case when you can’t pass the ball straight. They were observation that were accurate but he could have said the same about his team at any stage during the season. Twice, I saw Derry play this league and the same problems were there. This is a group who actually cannot foot-pass the ball with the result that Paddy Bradley has to drop too deep to get possession, moving out of scoring range. After that they don’t have the forwards to compensate.
Derry football hasn’t been this bad since the 1980s and even then, at least they didn’t show up for a derby in their opening championship game looking unfit. Five years ago this was a side winning the league, four years ago this was a side that were a game away from back-to-back crowns in the competition. This is a county that boasted one of the most intense club championships in Ulster but hasn’t had a winner since 2003, the longest run since Lavey ended a barren period in 1990. This is a county that given the numbers have always punched above their weight but right now they pack no punch at all and Longford will be fancied to put them out of their misery for the season. And put John Brennan out of his obvious misery as well.
5. A qualified success
So you weren’t up early enough to see the draw for the first round of the back door but that’s your problem. The GAA were right to move it from Sunday to Monday, their thinking being that sports pages are too full on the first day of the working week and it would get more attention a day later. The only problem is getting people talking is all well and good as long as there is something to talk about. But with the demise of the middle-tier of football teams and the collapse of the lower-tiers, there’s nothing really worthy of more than a passing mention. Longford and Derry will be interesting, Roscommon and Armagh possibly interesting but after that, there’s nothing. That’s not the GAA’s fault, there’s just a dearth of watchable teams outside of the top 12 right now.
