she found love

Watch out, Gilesy! Rihanna impresses with astute analysis of the World Cup

Pop-star puts some pundits to shame by offering deep, well-read opinions on a number of games.

UP UNTIL NOW, Rihanna has tweeted haphazardly about the World Cup. She showed her appreciation for Robin van Persie’s equalising goal for Holland against Australia. She criticised the lack of awareness from the England defence in allowing Luis Suarez race clear and score Uruguay’s winner on Thursday. She condemned Italy’s lethargy and casual approach to their clash with Costa Rica. But already this weekend, she’s taken her analysis to a whole new level.

Lakers Clippers Basketball RiRi is used to keeping a close eye on the action and has already offered more cogent World Cup analysis than Ossie Ardiles. Mark J. Terrill / AP/Press Association Images Mark J. Terrill / AP/Press Association Images / AP/Press Association Images

Spending Saturday glued to her TV, she was absorbed by the first fixture of the day as Iran seemed set to frustrate Argentina with some relentlessly impressive defending. The seductive songstress pondered on the relative ineffectiveness of the South American’s star player, clearly insinuating that Lionel Messi’s pre-game criticism of coach Alejandro Sabella’s tactics was ironic given his subsequent poor showing against the almost-amateurs. Controversial.

Brazil Soccer WCup Argentina Iran Martin Meissner / AP/Press Association Images Martin Meissner / AP/Press Association Images / AP/Press Association Images

As Iran offered some pluck on the counter-attack, RiRi was suitably impressed by the contribution of Argentina goalkeeper Sergio Romero. The net-minder made one superb stop in particular,  getting his fingertips to a looping header from Ashkan Dejagah and pushing it over the bar. The acrobatics received the fulsome praise and an intriguing cross-reference from the notoriously tough critic. Romero’s movement, she argued, was balletic. Cultured.

Deep in injury-time, Messi conjured a moment of genius to jink inside one tackle and curl a magnificent strike to the far corner. Cryptically, Rihanna’s immediate response was one of scorn, spelling the front-man’s surname with dollar signs instead of the letter ‘s’, hinting that it was about time the Barca man came up with a game-breaking moment given his profile and reputation within the game, not to mind the lucrative contract Messi signed with the Catalan club last month. Damning.

But, she also acknowledged the ability of the diminutive dynamo to keep calm and unlock what had been a robust and impenetrable Iranian rearguard. His composure under pressure – the seconds ticking by, Argentina facing a humiliating result, was certainly impressive though in praising Messi’s winner, Rihanna also paid tribute to the hard graft, teamwork and determination of the Iranians – the narrative that was forgotten as soon as Messi’s strike rippled the net. Fair.

Brazil Soccer WCup Argentina Iran Jon Super / AP/Press Association Images Jon Super / AP/Press Association Images / AP/Press Association Images

Soon after, Rihanna settled in for Germany’s clash with Ghana and found the tepid first-half frustrating, probably given the German’s solid possession stats and how they failed to translate those numbers into clear-cut opportunities. Though Mesut Ozil and Mario Goetze did offer plenty of movement, RiRi was understandably unimpressed at the team’s inability to get out of second gear. Hard-hitting.

Brazil Soccer WCup Germany Ghana Frank Augstein / AP/Press Association Images Frank Augstein / AP/Press Association Images / AP/Press Association Images

As much as Ghana temporarily held the lead after Andre Ayew’s superb header was quickly followed up by Asamoah Gyan’s unerring strike, Rihanna felt a German reaction was inevitable, that the cheap Philipp Lahm give-away in the build-up to the African’s equaliser and the ease with which Muntari was allowed slip through a pass for Gyan, would anger Jogi Low’s side, that the lapses in concentration would spur them to deliver a powerful response. As usual, she was proved correct. Unerring.

Ultimately, the evergreen Miroslav Klose stepped off the bench to conjure a dramatic equaliser for the Germans, stretching to stab home from close range after a near-post flick-on. Rihanna was quick to compliment the striker, who equalled Ronaldo’s World Cup goal-scoring record with his 15th tournament goal. The 36 year-old has been a relentless scoring machine and according to Rihanna, class is permanent. Using some technical jargon, she illustrated her point perfectly with the aid of some visuals. Modern.

10 British-based tweeters who can’t believe that Gaelic Football is a thing

Martin O’Neill photobombed on the Copacabana by man with an ‘Up Cavan’ sign

Your Voice
Readers Comments
    Submit a report
    Please help us understand how this comment violates our community guidelines.
    Thank you for the feedback
    Your feedback has been sent to our team for review.